Slogging along

Yesterday, I quickly read over a couple of years of personal journal entries. I'm amazed at the similarities I find, especially in springtime (mid-March and slightly later) entries:

• The weather sucks. It's grey, rainy/snowy/icy and I don't feel like going anywhere.
• I'm sick.
• Teaching a bunch of low-skills students who do not give a hoot about the subject is frustrating.
• I'm lonely.

Can't do much about the weather. I'm not sure what to say about the sick part, though some of it is certainly related to emotions. (My nurse/practitioner thinks SAD, Seasonal Affective Disorder, might be worth looking into.)

Lonely is an ongoing problem, not too likely to go away, but I'm going to push myself to take myself out on dates, etc. (especially after the current health problem calms down).

Obsessing over wrongs. I tend to do that, licking old wounds. Sometimes it has to be done. Doing it now. But eventually I need to stop—perhaps to be forceable about it because it's an addiction.

Boring students, bored teacher. My 8:00 class yesterday was sort of an illustration. This gang never has been great at attendance, but when 8 came around there were three. A few more drifted in. I think the real key here is:

1. Don't take it personally. Some of these kids are in their last two months of college and they know it.
2. Do some content that I think is fun and interesting. Some of the students will come along. The rest are lost anyhow.

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One interesting discovery was that, after a particularly strong public rebuke from the priest, I was asking myself whether I should simply leave the parish.